The first drop

The first drop…

They say when something seems too good to be true, it usually isn’t true. That there is some sort of catch waiting for you. Lately, I’ve been working on manifesting this beautiful, too good to be true, dream of living a creative life into existence. I’m now at a point where it seems so simple. What I need to do is so clear and easy, and right in front of me to simply take as mine. And yet I find myself sitting and staring, waiting for the catch. Feeling as if I’ve missed something, it can’t be this easy. As if someone will come and slap my hand for taking the easy option and say jokes on you! (Probably because that was the environment I was raised in.)

The funny thing is, it isn’t all that easy to pour my heart and soul out for the world to see. It takes more courage than anything I’ve ever done!

So here I am, planning my first drop. Knowing that I will face technical difficulties and will be able to figure it out. Fully knowing that not everyone will like my work and that is ok. Fully knowing that even if my voice shakes, I still can do this. Fully knowing that even if my mom is the only person who buys a painting, I still sold a painting! Fully knowing that my imposter voice will throw a temper tantrum but I will not allow it to stop me. 

I am planning this first drop with the knowledge that dreams don’t work unless you do, and I have a huge dream to live! I am doing this knowing, I have to start somewhere. This first drop is exactly what its called, the first, meaning it is my early work and my paintings will only get better in time. 

I am also doing this as a 35 year old who has already been chewed up and spit out by life one too many times. Who tried the corporate world and is too disgusted by it to partake any more. I’m doing this drop with the courage of a 35 year old who is ready for her crayons back……. I don’t want to try to save the world any more, I just want to make it a pretty place to exist in.

Recently in my journaling, I wrote a line that I think sums up so many feelings I have about this chapter of my life. “I think my soul has been an artist it’s whole life and I made it do its choirs first.” I truly feel like I’ve only just discovered what I’m here on this earth to do, what my passion and calling is. This chapter of my life is full of so much anxiety and fear of the unknown and stepping out of my comfort zone. But it is also so calming, as if it is what I was made to do. It is one of the first things that felt beyond natural, pure magical actually.

If you don’t start today, what makes you think you will start tomorrow?

If you don’t start today, what makes you think you will start tomorrow?

You know those projects or adventures that are forever in the back of your mind. Those ones you think ‘someday it will happen.’ The ones that will happen when life calms down. When the time is right type of things.

Well the time is never right, life never calms down and someday is today! Today is the day. You might already be exhausted from the day as it nears bedtime but is tomorrow going to be any different?

Today is the day!

I’m at the point in life where I’ve waited too long for things to be right. The end of everyday will leave me exhausted but I’d rather be exhausted and accomplished. I’m done waking up in the morning wishing I’d done it last night.

The last 3 weeks I’ve put in the effort. Working out morning and night. Cooking fresh veggies for every meal. Building the desk I dreamed of. Running the financial numbers I wanted to and crushing our goals. Writing blog post every chance I get. I’m done putting off the life I want, the body I want, the dream job I want. It may not be perfect everyday but it is better than nothing. 

What are you putting off today in hopes of starting tomorrow? Why not start today? Go get the life you want!

Done is better than perfect!

My blog is officially up and live!

It only took me 3 years. It is the perfect example of the phrase I’m trying to strive for lately. Done is better than perfect.

I wouldn’t say I’m a perfectionist but I tend to delay things because it isn’t perfectly the way I want it. It’s silly, why do we put things off because they aren’t perfect? I’ve started doing a check with myself, if it does the job I need to it to, then move forward. Balancing perfect vs done can at times feel impossible. I want the house cleaned, but I want it really deep cleaned and perfect! Hiring a cleaning crew to clean the house every other week was an amazing move! Now I deep clean when I see the need but my home is cleaned on a regular basis. I want to do an amazing workout and really get in shape but I don’t have time for the gym and I would only do a small workout at home so I don’t do one at all.

The judgement call that can push us over the edge of done and perfect can be a small factor or a large factor but depending on the task at hand makes all the difference in the world! When I notice my perfectionist side kick in, I have to force myself to just get it done. And when I start slacking and doing a subpar job, I have to limit the number of projects I’m working on so I can perfect them. That balance for me is an ongoing struggle.

Honestly, I feel the fact that I can see that struggle and drive in myself makes me happy with myself. I’m not a perfectionist. I can be a perfectionist if needed. But I work to balance it so each task gets the appropriate amount of effort.

How do you balance Perfection vs Done?